Grace In Between

I have been feeling compelled to start a blog for months now. I would like to tell you that I’m unsure of the reason that it has been so heavy on my heart, but that’s not exactly the truth. I think I am supposed to share about a recent revelation that Jesus has shown me, but because of several negative reactions- I reached the conclusion that I shouldn’t. After weeks and weeks of justifying why it would be best to keep to myself, Jesus continued to show me that He wanted otherwise. While I know that for many months, the only people who are going to read these blogs will be my mom and my grandma, I know that The Father would not have this on my heart if He did not have any purpose in it. So, here I am, sharing a lot of things I am ashamed of, in hopes that just one person will see what I’ve seen.

I was a huge fan of Instagram and twitter. I had something like 700 followers on Instagram, and probably about the same on Twitter. I only followed about one-third of my followers, which in the social media world would be considered, “a really good ratio.” I posted one or two pictures a day, and always got well over 100 ‘likes’, along with comments about how ‘artsy’ my pictures were. I knew they were good pictures, that’s why I posted them. My favorite pictures to post were ones of sunsets followed by a bible verse caption, or a picture of my feet in beautiful scenery, or a picture of my Starbucks cup and a corner of my bible. You know the drill, I had the typical Christian Instagram. And the fact that I could make myself look like a wonderful, artsy Christian and get instant gratification… was something I couldn’t get enough of.

I thought it was harmless. I was following all the commandments I knew, I was setting a good example, and I certainly wasn’t falling into the traps of drinking and drugs like everyone else was. I had it all together, and everyone could see that. I was more content that you’d ever imagine.

Until in some quiet time, The Spirit posed the question to me, “If all of this went away, would I be enough for you?”

It didn’t take long for everything I had invested in to quickly unravel. Within minutes, I had deleted my Instagram and my Twitter entirely. And within about 30 seconds of that, I was thinking, “Oh my gosh… What have I done? What am I going to post for so-and-so’s birthday? How will I share about my trip to the Dominican Republic? What if people forget I exist because they stop seeing my posts?What if people think I’m just doing this to be different?”

But that was what Jesus wanted. He wanted me to be different. Here’s why.

He wanted me to really, truly, unconditionally love people, not just post about loving them.

He wanted me to truly pursue His heart, not just tell people I was pursuing His heart.

He wanted me to stop going to Starbucks so that people could see me reading His word, and actually begin to crave reading it every day.

He wanted me to stop getting the approval of my 700 followers, so the only approval I ever truly needed would be His.

It all seemed so simple and so easy. But once my social media was gone, I had to start doing a lot of things differently. I’m having to do more for peoples’ birthdays, because I can’t post their ‘birthday picture collage’ for them. I’m having to call people more, and check in on them, because I never know what they’re doing or how they are. I’m having think and act with more grace than ever, and love people whole-heartedly, even though many don’t agree with my decision.

If I can have one thing, it would be that all 2 people who end up reading this blog would ask themselves this questions:

If someone took away my social media- my way of showing love for others, my way of professing my faith, my way of getting ‘likes’, my way of sharing everything important- if they took that all away, would Jesus, just Jesus, be enough?

If the answer is anything but “Yes”, don’t freak out. You’re human. You’re like me, and almost every other kid in your youth group.

We’re human, and we like human things.

But if you’re willing to give it up, our supernatural Dad is offering something much, much greater than all the insta-likes in the world.

I dare you to accept the offer.