I have recently noticed many phrases that followers of Jesus will coin in the hard seasons of life, whether in an attempt to offer comfort, in a song of joy after our prayers are answered, or in a time of seeking answers for ourself or other people. While many of these are true, I’ve chosen to withhold from saying them. Here they are, and here’s why.
1) “I don’t feel called…”
The reason for this one comes straight from a dear brother of mine, who was speaking on this a few weeks ago. God does call specifically. The Spirit of Jesus will move on hearts when we least expect it and call people to do the most radical things we’ve ever seen. I have seen Him make specific calls: to my beloved sister who He told to pursue mission work in Europe, to my dear friend who He has called to an orphanage in Uganda, to my fellow worship leader who He has sent to a bible college for the specific purpose of entering ministry– I could go on forever. I have seen the specific calls. But God has already made a general call. It is to make disciples, it is to love people, it is to love Him. If what you are debating on doing falls under this general call that is The Word of God, don’t waste any more time. “We cannot mask our inability to make a decision with spiritual patience” – accrediting our stalling to us ‘waiting on God’. Often times, if we truly know the one, large, powerful, general call of being a Christian, there is nothing to wait on.
2) “God was watching over you.”
This is often included when we are praising our God for giving us the outcome we wanted. Someone survived a wreck, someone is cured of a disease, someone beat the odds. And was God watching over them? Yes. Of course He was. He is a God who is in-tune with our worlds and in-tune with our lives. He is present always, He doesn’t leave, He doesn’t turn a blind eye. But what does “God was watching over you” mean for the person who didn’t get what they prayed for? What does it mean for the person who didn’t walk away from the wreck, or for the person who leaves the hospital with their days numbered on their fingers? I know this phrase never means such a thing, but it implies that God wasn’t watching over them. It implies God is a present, safe place who makes the good happen, but not a present, safe place when the pain comes. And we know – from the Word – God is omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent. He is in everything, always.
3) “Everything happens for a reason.”
Indeed, it does. What a merciful and graciously loving God we have, to promise us that there is indeed a reason for everything here on earth, even when we are feeling the sharpest corners of brokenness. This is such a gentle phrase that’s lovingly offered to me when, in my little faith, I want to find a reason for my suffering. I do know it to be true; there is always a reason, always a purpose, always some good coming from this downpour- much more good than I can see from where I’m standing. But in the wake of a tragedy, I’ve never found this to be very comforting, most likely because we don’t know the ‘reason’ that we are speaking of. We cannot see it on this side of heaven. And quite frankly, many people are turned away by the thought of a God who “has a reason” for their parent dying, or “has a reason” for their spouse leaving, or “has a reason” for the treatment not working. We are never going to understand The Father’s plan until we are face-to-face with Him, and I don’t want to encourage people to try and do so before then.
4) “I’ll be praying for you.”
What a beautiful offer of love this is, when it is said in truth. I know so many wonderful people who say it in truth, and they really do pray. But because I am so guilty of this, I know others struggle here as well: often times, it’s an empty promise. It is instinct to put this phrase out there, to anyone and everyone who is hurting. There’s not much to say on this one, except for this: If you are like me, why not actually get down on your knees, speak with Jesus, and later comfort them with the thought that you have been lifting them up? It has been a good practice for me to pray and then comfort them, instead of offering prayers that I know I will forget about. Chances are, I needed the chatting time with Him anyways.
While these can be true, can be used correctly, and can bring peace, I am working on offering what I know could never be offered at the wrong time; God’s call has been made, and it is good. God was good, is good, and will always be good. Those are truths that I will never hesitate to bring to the table.
Grace In Between 